Conversation b/t old lady Donna & Joel at dinner...
Joel: Are these seats taken?
Donna: No. Sit. What's your name?
Joel: Joel. Ya know I think I have met you before over in that office...
Donna: Yea I don't know. I'm asleep half the time at work.
(**ah yes a true gov't employee**)
Donna: You are Filipino.
Joel: Yes, yes I am. Your husband is Filipino right?
Donna: Filipinos die young. How old were your parents when they died?
**interject me spitting the baked chicken out of my mouth and Joel's jaw dropping**
Joel: **awkward chuckle** oh my parents look very young.
Donna: So how old were they when they died?
Joel: Well my parents aren't dead.
Donna: Oh ........ long tangent listing off all the dead people in her life and how they died.......
Donna: You know the women in my family live a long time. I bet I will live to be 100. I wouldn't mind that as long as I'm not sitting in a chair somewhere drooling all over myself...
Donna: it's b/c the filipinos eat the chicken skin. I bet you eat the chicken skin don't you Joel. It looks like you are enjoying that chicken skin.
Joel: yes it's delicious...
Donna: I bet you also eat pork fat. Filipinos like pork fat. That's why they die young. Is this your girl friend over here?
**me sitting right next to Joel... apparently unable to speak for myself... it's probably b/c I am not Filipino.**
Joel: Yes.
Lauren: Uh...no.....
Joel: Ok she's just a coworker.
Donna: Well why not. You know those Filipinos make the best husbands. They treat you real well.
**interject me now choking on my Snapple Iced Tea...and crying I'm laughing so hard.**
Donna: You know...the bald ones too.... they are the best. such virility** Ok enjoy your chicken skin. I have to go get my ice cream.
**interject Lauren and Joel speechless, staring at each other...best dinner conversation ever**
**virile |ˈvirəl|adjective(of a man) having strength, energy, and a strong sex drive. See note atmale .
The characters in this story are in fact real. The randomness of the conversation is also real. Although the conversation may not be exact word for word it is b/c I was laughing and crying so hard I could not focus.
